[He killed a man for Vaporub... The exhaustion is so valid. His Catholic Guilt remains.]
I had the confirmation fairly early on.
[The items themselves come with the automatic feeling that You Know Them To Truly Work For Real, and that had been enough for him at the time, given everything else going on.]
[ Yeah he knows that there's the feeling that they know but sometimes you're just a paranoid bitch used to weird thought intrusions so you kind of force yourself to be uncertain anyway. ]
Great.
Well... what now? Looks like even with your confessions, it's still bothering you pretty badly.
[Valid of him as well honestly. If Lucas punched a man's heart out for nothing he would have simply exploded on the spot, so a little bit of paranoia probably doesn't hurt.
He just looks and feels a little uncertain, though.]
It's... not really about that... [He will simply die guilty, as you do.] I only wished to let you know so you could make decisions on interacting with me in the future accordingly.
[Like if he wanted to excommunicate Lucas from the church of goofy because of his skin of a killer Bella.]
[ Just cannot believe Daan was like 'I think there's an incentive killer' and then hearing there were three monsters was like 'oh okay nevermind' and now he's learning he was RIGHT!!! He needs to stop being right about things, he actually is not enjoying this. ]
If you feel so guilty, then you can contribute your best to figuring out how the rest of us can survive this. Mr. Kasuga most of all.
[HE WAS RIGHT....... Daan looked into Apollo's cave of wonders and Lucas was standing there with Vick's. Being right about these things is a curse.
Lucas is just a person steeped in Catholic Guilt in general, but there's a little thread of understanding there, even if he's still very much of the opinion that he can do all of these things while sitting quietly at the back of the metaphorical classroom and avoiding anyone who doesn't want to speak to him.]
I have been, and I will continue to do so, of course. Setting matters of penance aside, that is simply the only proper thing to be done.
...I'm really not the person to tell you this or that anyway.
[ He also feels bad about Izutsumi but... well he's also a bit naturally insane in the background now so that's great. But his version of penance for this is really just letting Izutsumi ask for whatever she wants even if that's, idk, breaking into his apartment room. ]
[A BIT NATURALLY INSANE. Well, there are probably no truly sane people left after being put through the Scawwy wringer. Penance looks difference to every person, anyway. He just lets Ichiban punch him. Sometimes that's all you can do until you go to hell to pay for your myriad crimes.]
I apologize... It wasn't my intention to put you on the spot or to ask you to mete out judgment beyond your own personal measure of it...
[Now it's his turn to sigh as he glances back toward the aquarium.]
[ Once you go through your third death tournament you just have truly ascended your limits. ]
Do you feel better, admitting to it?
[ On the surface, the emotion is the usually expected exhaustion. Learning Ichiban's death was a willful murder does suck. Knowing his reasons sucks even more. Sometimes it's actually easier to accept murder when it really is like 'oh, I did it because I'm a bad person'. Where did those bitches go? At the same time, there's just a faint undercurrent of something fucky, almost adoring that he's just trying to quash down. ]
[OH YEAH DAAN WAS ON THE YYH TOURNEY CYOA TOO FUCKING HELP. WELL!! Some people are just destined for so many rounds of death tournaments... Anyway yeah what this place needed was Mahito, but instead it just got this fucking guy who'd punch out hearts for his baby sister.
The surface emotion is indeed expected, but the undercurrent, faint and being quashed like a lil bug though it may be, nets a ripple of baffled surprise. Emotional equivalent of the panicking mr krabs meme as he looks around like sir are you okay.]
...I'd hardly say that it's a concern, whether or not it helps to ease my own heart. [But:] It doesn't, but that's fine enough. I would feel worse acting as though nothing had happened.
[BLORBO 2... this is what psls are for... or future mg wilds. googles marcoh like yeah that looks like a lowe blorbo as well.
There's a thin little smile.]
I don't believe there's any real escape for any of us, here. [They're in Silent Hill.] ...I'd have confessed much earlier, but I did so desperately wish to see Nadia doing well for myself, even if just the once...
[Truly the only thing keeping him from throwing himself down for the vote or telling everyone immediately after, just his selfish little heart that loves Nadia too much.]
[LOVES FROGS help cute... but surely that doesn't narratively go poorly for him!!!!
Anyway narratively things went very hilariously for Lucas, who truly did yakety sax from what he thought would be his last act of violence directly into another brutal murder where he had to watch a vampire pilot around his body like a gundam.]
I only wish that Aerith hadn't gotten caught up in it all. [If it weren't for the fact that another life was lost, he'd just accept it as some sort of divine penalty. But, a bit quieter and with a little touch of something like grief-threaded gratitude:]
Thank you, even so. [Being possessed SUCKS as Daan knows.] And yes, there's that. As long as there's still even the slimmest of chances that we can free ourselves from this situation, hope isn't yet dead.
[ Well... Daan doesn't have much more to say, personally. He does somewhat awkwardly shift his weight a bit onto his other foot, considering this... ]
All agreed and on the same page about moving forward. Just, uh... don't let it weigh you down too much? If nothing else, so this place can't use it against you.
This is truly so hilariously awkward, though. Lucas will never not confess his crimes but it feels unhinged and out of pocket every single time he interrupts a normal conversation to be like SO ANYWAY ABOUT ICHIBAN.]
True enough... [A SIGH.] --You've heard about the break-ins, I take it?
There's more about them in Aventurine or Boothill's notebooks, but that's the long and short of it. A bit like the ventures out into the fog, except we get rocks at the end instead of body parts. If you see a locked door and decide to open it, do be prepared.
[THIS MAKES HIM FEEL EXTREMELY UNEASY because the break-in kicked his whole ass and stole his lunch money and snapped his baby sister's neck in front of his eyes and now he's sweating because he hasn't been on a fog adventure yet. NO!!!!!!]
I see... Well, I do hope that it remains true for you. I think you've been through quite enough this past week.
[ No, unless you count being theoretical, on-a-technicality LMS in two death tournaments as lucky. ]
Pretty much exactly like that. Some people say stuff like that, that you can't be disappointed if your expectations are kept low to begin with. Not that I'm trying to sound like a nihilist or anything.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[ He only sighs, tired all-over again. ]
I see.
[ He killed a man for Vaporub...... ]
At least you got the confirmation that they certainly are real, and aren't just doing their best to make you believe it.
[ We all saw Camille die and then come back. ]
no subject
I had the confirmation fairly early on.
[The items themselves come with the automatic feeling that You Know Them To Truly Work For Real, and that had been enough for him at the time, given everything else going on.]
no subject
Great.
Well... what now? Looks like even with your confessions, it's still bothering you pretty badly.
no subject
He just looks and feels a little uncertain, though.]
It's... not really about that... [He will simply die guilty, as you do.] I only wished to let you know so you could make decisions on interacting with me in the future accordingly.
[Like if he wanted to excommunicate Lucas from the church of goofy because of his skin of a killer Bella.]
no subject
He just looks at him. ]
You think excluding you out is going to help us progress the big plan from here on out?
no subject
I can still help without forcing others to socialize with me.
[Though the people here are all painfully accepting of his terrible little murderpaws and still drag him out to do things every day anyway.]
no subject
If you feel so guilty, then you can contribute your best to figuring out how the rest of us can survive this. Mr. Kasuga most of all.
no subject
Lucas is just a person steeped in Catholic Guilt in general, but there's a little thread of understanding there, even if he's still very much of the opinion that he can do all of these things while sitting quietly at the back of the metaphorical classroom and avoiding anyone who doesn't want to speak to him.]
I have been, and I will continue to do so, of course. Setting matters of penance aside, that is simply the only proper thing to be done.
no subject
[ He also feels bad about Izutsumi but... well he's also a bit naturally insane in the background now so that's great. But his version of penance for this is really just letting Izutsumi ask for whatever she wants even if that's, idk, breaking into his apartment room. ]
no subject
I apologize... It wasn't my intention to put you on the spot or to ask you to mete out judgment beyond your own personal measure of it...
[Now it's his turn to sigh as he glances back toward the aquarium.]
...Well. There you have it, in any case.
no subject
Do you feel better, admitting to it?
[ On the surface, the emotion is the usually expected exhaustion. Learning Ichiban's death was a willful murder does suck. Knowing his reasons sucks even more. Sometimes it's actually easier to accept murder when it really is like 'oh, I did it because I'm a bad person'. Where did those bitches go? At the same time, there's just a faint undercurrent of something fucky, almost adoring that he's just trying to quash down. ]
no subject
The surface emotion is indeed expected, but the undercurrent, faint and being quashed like a lil bug though it may be, nets a ripple of baffled surprise. Emotional equivalent of the panicking mr krabs meme as he looks around like sir are you okay.]
...I'd hardly say that it's a concern, whether or not it helps to ease my own heart. [But:] It doesn't, but that's fine enough. I would feel worse acting as though nothing had happened.
no subject
[ I would've killed to have CR'd Lucas with Marcoh actually... my other blorbo... they're so similar on so many beats. ]
Speaks to at least some level of integrity for wanting to be honest at least.
no subject
There's a thin little smile.]
I don't believe there's any real escape for any of us, here. [They're in Silent Hill.] ...I'd have confessed much earlier, but I did so desperately wish to see Nadia doing well for myself, even if just the once...
[Truly the only thing keeping him from throwing himself down for the vote or telling everyone immediately after, just his selfish little heart that loves Nadia too much.]
no subject
...And yet, the affliction took you next. This place really knows how to hand-pick the cruelties.
My condolences for that much. At least it's not over? There's still the chance.
no subject
Anyway narratively things went very hilariously for Lucas, who truly did yakety sax from what he thought would be his last act of violence directly into another brutal murder where he had to watch a vampire pilot around his body like a gundam.]
I only wish that Aerith hadn't gotten caught up in it all. [If it weren't for the fact that another life was lost, he'd just accept it as some sort of divine penalty. But, a bit quieter and with a little touch of something like grief-threaded gratitude:]
Thank you, even so. [Being possessed SUCKS as Daan knows.] And yes, there's that. As long as there's still even the slimmest of chances that we can free ourselves from this situation, hope isn't yet dead.
no subject
Yeah...
[ Well... Daan doesn't have much more to say, personally. He does somewhat awkwardly shift his weight a bit onto his other foot, considering this... ]
All agreed and on the same page about moving forward. Just, uh... don't let it weigh you down too much? If nothing else, so this place can't use it against you.
no subject
This is truly so hilariously awkward, though. Lucas will never not confess his crimes but it feels unhinged and out of pocket every single time he interrupts a normal conversation to be like SO ANYWAY ABOUT ICHIBAN.]
True enough... [A SIGH.] --You've heard about the break-ins, I take it?
no subject
no subject
There's more about them in Aventurine or Boothill's notebooks, but that's the long and short of it. A bit like the ventures out into the fog, except we get rocks at the end instead of body parts. If you see a locked door and decide to open it, do be prepared.
no subject
[ It's going to be really hard to clear the bar set by his CYOA. IMAGINE IT GETS WORSE SOMEHOW. HE'D JUST BE LIKE TAKE ME OUT ALREADY.
Insert image of Daan on a break-in right now but it's not actually a break-in at all, the hotel is so nice. ]
no subject
I see... Well, I do hope that it remains true for you. I think you've been through quite enough this past week.
no subject
Wouldn't that be nice? Too bad I don't exactly have a lot of faith that things will suddenly turn up for me.
no subject
[Daan have you ever been lucky in all your life except for getting married to a lovely lady.]
no subject
Pretty much exactly like that. Some people say stuff like that, that you can't be disappointed if your expectations are kept low to begin with. Not that I'm trying to sound like a nihilist or anything.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)